What is reconciliation?
Reconciliation is the process of righting wrongs and restoring relationships. Residents who have left Hope Gospel Mission in bad standing are allowed grace to make things right and restore their relationship with Hope Gospel Mission and be in good standing again.
Who can reconcile?
Residents in bad standing who have been out of our program for at least 30 days are able to begin the reconciliation process.
How long does the reconciliation process take?
There are several factors that affect how long reconciliation takes. One of these factors is how quickly a former resident and others involved return messages and take care of items on their list. Another is how many things need to be reconciled. The process typically takes 2-4 weeks.
Eight Steps To Biblical Forgiveness
- Step 1: Have the OFFENDER confess specifically to the OFFENDED what was done or said wrong that caused offense. It appears that the specific act of confessing the OFFENDER's sins (Leviticus 5.5, Numbers 5:7, James 5:16, 1 John 1:9), demonstrates to the OFFENDED party the OFFENDER's godly sorrow, the OFFENDER's knowledge of the sin committed, and the OFFENDER's willingness to accept responsibility and consequences for their actions.
- Step 2: Have the OFFENDING party identify the biblical principle(s) they violated. In this step, the process of identifying the actual biblical values and principles that were violated helps both the OFFENDER and the OFFENDED to learn from God's Word, and learn from their experiences. As a result, their witness encourages the whole Body of Christ to grow more holy.
- Step 3: Have the OFFENDER ask the OFFENDED "How were you wronged when I did (or said)......... This step allows the OFFENDER to experience in part and hopefully bear the OFFENDED's burdens, (Hebrews 13:2) in a large way, by how the OFFENDED was impacted by the offense. We know that Christ suffered and died on the cross for our sins, when we offended Him--it appears important for the human side of the model for the OFFENDER to fully understand the consequences and impact of his sin against.
- Step 4: Have the OFFENDER recall, as best they can, a time when they were wronged/offended by another, in the same way they caused offense. Examples are not always easy to recall in a short amount of time, but stick with it, the rewards will be more than worth it. Remember the biblical values and principles in Step 2, and this should help the OFFENDER to remember a time when someone sinned against them, violating those same biblical values principles, and how Christ has changed them, 2 Corinthians 1:1-7.
- Step 5: Have the OFFENDER restate their sin(s) expressing Godly Sorrow (2 Corinthians 7:10-14) AND wait for the OFFENDED's response. I used to say for step 5: Ask for forgiveness. But the more I studied, the more I realized the asking put an unbiblical pressure/expectation on the OFFENDED. A simple confession before God and others, with Godly Sorrow is enough. The response from the OFFENDED is fully the OFFENDED's responsibility.
- Step 6: Have the OFFENDER repeat in their own words, the answer given by the OFFENDED, when expressing Godly Sorrow. This steps gives the OFFENDER a chance to restate clearly the answer he heard. This will usually bring a better understanding and become a foundational step toward rebuilding trust in a Godly relationship.
- Step 7: Have the OFFENDER ask, "What can I do differently, so I won't hurt you again?" Here the biblical act of repentance and the turning away from his sin is brought into the forgiveness act. Each now bears the trust and responsibility to bear one another's burdens, and together work out a way in which they can show love and develop trust, based on biblical values and principles. It's acceptable to include follow-up meetings, as necessary, to gain feedback, establish accountability so that reconciliation, restitution, and restoration have been completed.
- Step 8: Restitution: What can we do to make you whole. Far from the normal charge of punishment or revenge, restitution involves the whole Christian Community including the OFFENDER and OFFENDED, pursuing justice, mercy and faithfulness.